we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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