WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
