I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
