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Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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