Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
It's rum buckets o'clock
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
