i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Randomize