woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize