I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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