try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
