I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize