my sisters under your porch take her home
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
