Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
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