yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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