It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
