my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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