I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
