And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
