oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
