Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
