dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
