Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
