it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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