Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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