and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
