Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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