i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
