...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize