Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize