She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize