their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
please come you make the beer taste better
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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