My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
