am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
