Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Randomize