he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize