all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Randomize