I CAN MOONWALK!
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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