I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
