Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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