It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
