i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Text me some of your sweat
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
