oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize