are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
