I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
