He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
