I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
