I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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