you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
