Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
