Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize