We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Randomize
