so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I currently don't understand fingers.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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