Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
just tell him i said nine months
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
